Photoshop Sock Hop: Merit Badge #2

In honor of the inimitable Feral Mom, I present the second in a series of Thumbscrews' Blog-o-licious Merit Badges.

As before, there will be a contest for the best/funniest photo of a reader wearing or otherwise employing (Coaster! Itty-bitty megaphone! Rolling paper! Print three copies, string 'em together with rubber bands and make your own exotic dancer's outfit!) said badge. This is despite the fact that the previous contest garnered precisely ZERO entries; hopefully you won't all be too busy dousing your shells in alfredo to participate.

All entries do NOT become the property of Thumbscrews Inc. and/or affiliated subsidiary entities including but not limited to Jul, the baby, and the fourteen year-old Honda which goes roughly as fast as a Thorazine-addled snail; Thumbscrews Inc. makes no guarantees explicit or implied not to Photoshop your head onto, say, a picture of "Purple Rain"-era Prince, or maybe one of those monkeys with the blazingly red asses. Thumbscrews Inc. and Baby Thumbscrews (who isn't yet capable of using the PC, but DOES like to DJKERJLWERJLDSKJFSDF SDFL:SDFJGW go all Ginger Baker on the keyboard) and the ancient Honda (given name: Transihito) do, however, solemnly swear NOT to forward said ass-monkey images to your boss along with the caption, "I don't know about you, but I sure as hell wouldn't want MY accounts received by this dipshit!", no matter how evilly tempted.

What's that, you say? Silly, vulgar merit badge not enough? Clamoring for more jackassery and nice subtle drop shadows? Perhaps in the form of old pictures of J.Q. which I entered into IMDB's "Pitch Your Picture" contest (I was ROBBED, incidentally)? It just so happens that I can help you out: